Should You Make the First Move on a Guy?

Hello people *front flips in here*

Yeah, I’m back with my dramatic entrances especially as preparations are on top speed for tomorrow (not with me, with you guys). So I’d like to know your 2 cents on this topic, what do you think about a girl taking the bull by its horns and making the first move? Do you think it’s no big deal? I mean what if you really like this guy and you’re almost certain he feels the same way about you but is just being a wuss? Would you wait for “Mohammed” to come to you? What if he’s taking too long? What if “Mohammed” became exhausted before he got to the top of the mountain? *shrugs*

Guys, would you have a girl make the first move on you? Or is it a big turn off? Have you found yourself in a situation like this? How did you handle it? Did you feel the exact same way?

You guys wanna know what I think yeah? I’d rather not be the first to make a move on a guy. I’ve not done it before nor do I intend to. Not that I’m totally against it or anything, matter of factly, I actually think of girls who do as courageous. No, Seriously I do (*straight face*). It really does take a lot of guts to walk up to a guy, and say “Yo, so here’s the thing; I really like you a lot (Or I’m attracted to you/ I think you’re hot). I hope you feel the same way about me and we can build something together (Or maybe just have a fling or whatever), but irrespective of how you feel, I just think you should know. Okbye” (Omg!) I’m having goose bumps from picturing myself in that role right now. Special shout-out to girls who have done this before. Mehn!! Weh done ma *In Falz voice* Truth be told, in spite of my admiration for girls who have such liver, I also have reservations. Might I add that with regards to this topic, I speak for the African population, although this issue cuts across all races. Take for example, the Irish have the Leap year exception tradition. You do know about it right? Where a lady can propose to her man every February 29th. Even though it’s not the exact same thing but I’d say it’s related. I mean, If a girl can be the first to own up to a guy about her feelings, then she might as well keep at it to the very end. It shouldn’t be a big deal her proposing to him as well, don’t you think? (Just saying. No judgements whatsoever).

You wanna know what my reservations are innit? Because it so isn’t because I lack the courage myself. I mean what could be worse than rejection; like Katie Glass wrote in her article on the leap-year proposal, “We already face it (rejection) every time we try on a size 10 jeans”. I know I’m probably starting to sound like a two-faced bitch but isn’t there something that you feel indifferent about (or even admire) when other people indulge in it but you wouldn’t be caught dead doing? (Do share. Leave a comment).

So where were we? Oh yeah! My reservations. So putting aside my experience, I’ve read a lot of books and articles on relationships and men, and one thing that “they” all agree on is that men appreciate a relationship/anything/woman more when they invest a lot of time, attention and effort into getting it/her than if it/she comes easy. This is totally relatable and sheds some light on the existence of the popular belief, “Men love the chase”. The process of “the chase” entails effort, time, attention and so on, now you get right? For me, one of the basic necessities─asides many others (*winks* lol)─ in a relationship is to be valued. Having put into experiment what would happen if anything pertaining women and relationships come easy to men,  the results affirmed what all the articles and books I’ve read reiterate. (This isn’t to say that there aren’t gonna be exceptions. The end result is all that matters). Therefore, I’d rather not risk starting the prospects of a relationship serving my heart and feelings on a platter of gold to a man (whose specie has over the years proven to have a genetically programmed tendency to take females for granted), thank-you-very-much.

There you have it, but that’s just one girl’s opinion. I’d really love to know what your own opinion and experiences are. If you have ever told a guy about your feelings first, did he feel the same way? Did you guys date eventually? Are you guys still together? Does he treat you right? If you’ve had a girl walk up to you and tell you she’s in love with you, how did it go? Did you find it sexy or yucky? Did you end up starting a relationship with her? Do tell guys. I look forward to reading your comments.

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If you’re running into my blog for the first time, it’s great to have you here. A good place to start is the “START HERE” page. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Have a lovely Valentine’s Day.

❤️ Always,

Jasmine 🌸

Your flaws are perfect for the heart that’s meant to love you.

– Trent Shelton

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7 Comments Add yours

  1. I agree with you. Plus guys can be cowardly sometimes. The guy might not even like the girl but he would rather date her than just come clean. True story. I don’t think it works although there are always exceptions. Plus different folks different strokes, so … . Btw the pic is Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock from the Proposal. Now I have to go watch that movie all over again😍😍

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    1. Lol. It was a really great movie btw. Thanks for your 2 cents 😘❤️ and thanks for reading.

      Like

  2. Ayomide otokiti says:

    I actually agree with the fact that the lady should not shoot her shot, because guys love the chase before they can value the lady. On the other hand some ladies also will form hard to get all in the name of he loves the chase till he gets tired and when they finally say yes, there is no value anymore because all the energy has been used to chase.
    My personal experience was me having a girl tell me she likes me. I have actually not seen that happen in my entire life till that day, like I have never seen a girl with that level of courage, fine girl ooo, I felt like the ground should just open and swallow me Cos I was used to the guy shooting the shot. To cut the long story short, we never dated even though I learnt a lot from her and we were still very close ever after. So it shouldn’t be a normal thing for a girl to shoot the shot, just in rare cases, allow the guy do it and also make the chasing period moderate and then state your limits and boundaries and then he will value you.
    😁😁
    Thank you

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    1. Oh wow! This is a lot. Yeah it does take a lot of courage for a girl to make the first move. Thanks for your 2 cents. ❤️

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  3. Suz says:

    So I’ve never “shot my shot” but I once told a guy I liked him a lot when we just started talking (technically that’s shooting my shot lol). Anyway that didn’t end well, 1/10 would not recommend.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Catherine says:

    I would totally do this if I found a guy I liked who didn’t make a move on me. I mean women keep saying they want to be treated equally as men so we gotta take on some of their so called responsibilities. #sheisequal

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Temmie says:

    I’m with you on this Jasmine. I don’t see myself walking up to a guy even if my heart is #turnioniown😂.. its just right that the guy does all the hardwork to win you over. Its one thing I’ve learnt over the years that you never value what you get so cheaply, you value what you took your time and resources to get (its also applicable to material things). This is my opinion..

    Liked by 1 person

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